


What We Did

by imamotherfuckingstarlord



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Cheating, F/M, Infidelity, Marriage, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-25
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:15:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26641297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imamotherfuckingstarlord/pseuds/imamotherfuckingstarlord
Summary: After finding out you were pregnant, Bucky agrees to help you leave the hero life. The two of you go to Seattle, and hamper down for six months until you start dreaming of a certain someone. Convinced the dreams are a sign, you and Bucky go back to New York. Will everyone be happy to see the pair of you? What questions will they have? And will the lie Bucky and you made up finally resurface?
Relationships: Bucky/reader, Clint Barton/Reader, James "Bucky" Barnes/Reader, winter soldier/reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It's going to be an emotional roller coaster.

Chapter One: White Lie

You sat at the bar, smiling at your group of friends – they were throwing back drinks and you were nursing your own, finally relaxing after a long, long, long assignment in Germany. With a late flight the next day, everyone decided to kick back. So, there you all were, acting like a group of normal people – the Avengers, not avenging. It was nice, it was easy, and you were several drinks in, feeling a good buzz and trying to avoid his glance. His eyes finally connected with yours, sending waves of warmth and ease throughout your body – it was frightening, it was exhilarating, it was wrong.

It was all wrong, but then he got up from his spot next to Tony and made his way to you, a beer in hand and a smile, that stupid smile of his. And when he stood in front of you, nudging you playfully, you knew it was all over.

“Hey, wanna catch some fresh air?”

You knew the right answer, the answer was no, but all you could do was say yes. All you could do was not think of the consequences of leaving the bar for some fresh air with him. It was wrong, it was wrong, and you knew this. The two of you were consenting adults, throwing away any morality out the window and when his hand touched yours; it was all over.

Your eyes snapped opened as butterflies filled your stomach, causing you to sit up in bed. The room was dark and when you looked over to see the time on the alarm clock on the nightstand, you saw it was two in the morning. Leaning against the headboard, you ran a hand over your belly, it was getting bigger by the week, but you still had three months to go. Reaching over to the lamp, you turned it on and the body next to you stirred awake. A mess of brown hair moved as a face appeared from behind it, eyes groggily with sleep.

“What’s going on?”

“The baby,” you whispered, fingers running across your belly. “He’s making me dream of him, Bucky.”

“Whoa, whoa,” he said, sitting up beside you. “What are you talking about?”

Looking over to the man next to you, a man who gladly gave up being an Avenger to whisk you away to some life of normalcy, you felt a tug in your heart. A lie, so simple, so deceiving that was thrown into the world by the two of you, was now keeping you up at night.

“I think we need to go home, Buck. We need to go home.”

Bucky sighed and leaned over to press a kiss onto your clothed shoulder, his hand reaching down for your belly. His fingers ran up and down the “hill”, a fond nickname he came up with, making you laugh, because it tickled. You watched as he scooted down, coming face to face with your protruding belly and he marveled at the sight, never letting his hand leave the top of the hill.

“Hey, kiddo, you ready to go meet and answer tons of questions from your family? Cause I know I’m not, but your momma says we should, so we will.”

Feeling relief in your chest, you started to pet Bucky’s hair, laughing when your fingers got tangled. “It’s called a brush, James. You should learn to use one.”

“Ha ha,” he replied, moving back down to his sleeping spot. “I was in deep sleep.”

Laying back down, you turned to Bucky, your stomach pressing into his. “Thank you for everything, I know it must be hard being away from Steve and the others.”

“It isn’t,” he assured you. “You’re giving me something I thought I never could have. So, thank you.”

“It’s all based on one lie,” you whispered, dodging eye contact with the man. “We lied and now we are here and the baby knows and I…”

“I know.” Bucky closed his eyes and turned on his back, reaching down for your hand to bring it up to his chest. “We did what we had to, you know that right? We did what was best for all of us.”

All of us.

The baby, Bucky, you, and…

“Do you think he’ll know?” you asked, studying Bucky’s profile.

It had been about six months since the two of you left the Avenger’s facility. The team was shocked, of course, to hear that the two of you wanted out. Needed to walk away for a bit, reasons undisclosed. To be honest, they were more in shock that Bucky and you were an item; When did it happen? How long has it been going on? And what the hell? Those were the questions that flew at the two of you and Bucky answered them all, gracefully and in a tone, that ended any other lingering remarks. A week later, the two of you were in Seattle, in a small, two-bedroom apartment. Each of you had your own room at first, until pregnancy hormones and the dreams started to keep you up. Eventually, Bucky would come in and lay with you, the two of you talking endlessly it seemed until he’d looked over and see that you were sound asleep. Then it became routine, and before either of you knew it, it became normal.

You often watched Bucky moving around the apartment, and wondered if you loved him. It felt like love, the beginnings at least, and you thought that was enough for now. With the baby’s arrival date closer and closer, you thought it was best to focus on that. Except, he was always on your mind. You thought about him and the baby, how things could had ended up differently, and that’s when the wave of guilt would hit you. Every time, you’d sit and cry, when Bucky was out getting groceries or picking up something new for the baby, coming home to find you in that state. He was always reassuring and never made you feel like the disgusting person you thought you were. He was everything o you and the baby, Bucky was your saint.

“I don’t know, he’s a smart man,” Bucky said, bringing your knuckles to his lips. He kissed them softly and turned to you. “Come on, let’s get some sleep. I’ll book us a flight back to New York in the morning. Actually, are you allowed to travel?”

“I don’t know, I thought it was in the third trimester? I’ll call Dr. Lana tomorrow.”

Yawning, he nodded and started to close his eyes. “Good night, doll.”

With soft admiration in your heart, you snuggled as best as you could against Bucky and threw an arm around his waist. “Night, babe.”


	2. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky and reader take a plane home.

The plane ride was quiet, first class so would you be comfortable – according to Bucky, who fawned and fussed over whether it was a good idea to have you travel. Even after numerous reminders and a call from Dr. Lana, the man was still not satisfied and you supposed it was the destination that had him rattled. The two of you were not exactly forthcoming when you told the team you were together and wanted out of the avenging life. Neither of you mentioned the pregnancy and there was no hiding that now. Your stomach, while not so huge, was prominent and it was obvious you were carrying a child. Bucky’s child. His child. A child. It was a lot to handle and you had to hand it to Bucky, he was a fucking trooper.

“Everything will be fine,” you spoke quietly, tilting your head in his direction. Bucky was reading a baby book, eyes glued to the page.

“That’s what the book says,” he replied, barely glancing up to give you a smile before going back to his reading.

You chuckled and leaned back into the seat, flipping the window shutter up. The sky was light and bright, you could feel New York was close and a little dread wedged itself into your throat. Reaching into the pocket of the seat in front of you, you fetched out a water bottle and took a long gulp.

“You okay?”

You nodded yes and exhaled when the water was all gone. “I have to use the bathroom now.”

Bucky held back a laugh and got up from his seat. “Hurry, I think we’ll be landing soon.”

“Okay.”

He watched as you drifted down the aisle to the small bathrooms, finally sitting when he saw you enter the ladies’ lavatory.

You closed the door behind you and took a deep breath, grabbing your cell from your jacket pocket. Not really knowing if you could use the cell on an airplane, you took the risk and dialed a number you had known by heart. It rang four times before a gruff voice answered, squealing of children in the background.

“Hello?”

Heart pounding, you tried to open your mouth to speak, but it was no use. Quickly, you hung up and fought back the tears. Looking down at the cell phone in hand, you knew there was no tracing the call back or any chance of the person figuring it out was you – the moment Bucky and you landed in Seattle, the two of you tossed out the cells you had and replaced them with new ones. Of course, Bucky had given Steve his number, but ordered him not to pass it around and to only use it if he really needed to. Steve agreed on the terms that Bucky checked in every so often, which he did.

Your finger hovered over the redial number and before you could even think about pressing it again, the sensation of having to urinate came over you and like that, the thought was forgotten. Pulling down your black leggings, you settled onto the toilet and stared at the white door, a million and one thoughts ran through your mind and as you cleaned then flushed. You glared at mirror over the sink and sighed. You hardly recognized the woman staring back at you, she looked tired, but glowing all the same. Smiling, you placed a hand over your stomach.

“I’m sorry kiddo, I’ll try to relax more,” you promised, lifting your shirt to rub your skin. “Besides, we got Bucky and that make us the luckiest people in town.”

In that instant, the baby kicked and you yelped, laughing as a knock came from the door.

“Hey, you okay in there?”

Opening the door, shirt still lifted, you smiled at Bucky – who stood there, concern in his eyes.

“Is the baby okay?”

“He kicked, I mean full blown kicked. Not the butterflies I’ve been feeling lately,” you explained, grabbing his hand to place on your exposed stomach. “But a kick kick.”

“No way,” he mused, leaning forward to get his head closer. “Come on kid, show me what you got.”

The baby kicked again and Bucky’s eyes widen, looking up at you in disbelief. “He kicked!”

He stood up straight, hand still on your stomach and reached, with his free hand, for your neck. His eyes softened and for a moment, all the guilt, the lie that lingered in the air, didn’t matter.

“You’re amazing,” he whispered, taking a step closer as you took one forward. “So amazing…”

His voice trailed off as you closed your eyes just as his lips touched yours. His kiss was soft and loving and it was more than you deserved, but his palm against your stomach twitched when the baby kicked once more. The two of you laughed against each other’s mouths and pulled away just as it was announced over the PA system that the plane would be landing shortly.

“We better get back to our seats,” Bucky advised, pulling down your shirt.

Smiling, you nodded and took the hand he offered. “Lead the way.”

…..

The two of you sat in the back of town car that had been waiting at the airport, thanks to a certain billionaire. Nervous air filled the back of the car as Bucky held your hand gently, giving it a squeeze ever so often.

“We’re going to be okay,” he promised and you nodded, noting that facility was coming into view.

“They’re going to be shocked.”

Bucky chuckled and swept his hair back from his face. “Steve’s going to be pissed, we’ve talked a few times since we left and I never mentioned our baby.”

Our baby came out of his mouth so natural, it made you smile, but then the guilt came back and you sighed.

“I wonder if everyone will be there,” he questioned, frowning when you gave him an anxious look. “What?”

“I called him when I was in the bathroom,” you confessed, letting go of his hand before he could let go of yours. “I’m sorry.”

He grabbed back your hand and shook his head. “No need to be sorry. I take it he won’t be here?”

“I don’t think so.”

Bucky shrugged. “Maybe it’s for the best.”

Agreeing, you took a deep breath as the car came to a stop and several familiar faces appeared from the main doors of the facility. Feeling relieved and guilt that he wasn’t in the crowd, you gave Bucky’s hand a squeeze.

“You ready?”

He glanced out the window and quickly placed a kiss onto your knuckles. “It’s now or never.”


	3. Questions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team has questions.

Bucky got out of the town car first, beating the driver to your side of the door. He thanked the man and when he offered to get the bags from the trunk, Bucky said he had it. The door opened slowly and you gazed down at your belly – maybe you could hold off for a bit. Without a word, Bucky held out his hand, so you took it, along with a deep breath. The air was chilly as you got out of the car, and your eyes darted to your group of friends as you attempted to zip up your jacket – one you had bought a few sizes too big. You stood next to the car, shutting the door behind you as Bucky jogged over to the trunk to retrieve the bag the two of you packed. Holding your small bag against your belly, you smiled as Steve, Natasha, Sam, and Tony walked over.

“Man, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes,” Steve said, his arms extended for a hug. Not moving the bag, you let the man embrace you warmly and you had to admit it was nice. “I missed the two of you.”

“We missed you too, punk,” Bucky called out, as he closed the trunk with little effort. He swung the bag over his shoulder and walked over to Steve, giving the man a hard pat on the back. “It’s nice to be back.”

“So, are you going to hog their attention, Steve, or can we get a turn?”

You laughed at Natasha’s comment and pulled from Steve. “Let’s go inside.”

….

After several hugs and not one suspicious glance at your belly (the jacket was doing a great job), Bucky and you settled into his old room. Everyone else was setting up a late lunch in the kitchen, giving you time to change and relax for a moment.

“So, he’s not here,” you said.

Bucky watched as you peeled off the jacket. “I guess not. So, what are we going to tell them, because there is no hiding that.”

You frowned when he pointed to your belly. “That is our son, Barnes.”

He laughed and apologized. “You know what I mean.”

Sighing, you rubbed a hand over your ‘hill’ and shrugged. “I guess we tell them the truth…”

Bucky froze in place, eyes dropping to where your hand laid. “The truth?”

“Our truth.”

Nodding, he walked over to you and placed both hands on your shoulders. His smoldering eyes settled onto yours and he pressed a deep kiss onto your forehead. A silent promised filled the air as Bucky’s mouth left your skin and you knew no matter what happened, you had him. If everything went to shit here and everyone found out the truth and shunned you, rightfully so, you knew the three of you still had Seattle. The three of you would still have a chance at a normal life, a normal family.

“We better go,” you whispered.

Bucky agreed and reached down for your hand. “I’m ready when you are.”

You figured it didn’t matter whether you were ready or not, hell, you could go a lifetime without divulging the terrible thing you had done. But you knew, that was not how things flowed, it was time to acknowledge a few things, even if it meant not telling 100% of the truth. You motioned for Bucky to lead the way, because you knew the two of you had a lot of explaining to do.

….

“You two have a lot of explaining to do.”

Natasha’s face was cold stone, hands crossed against her chest. The others didn’t look to keen, except Steve, he couldn’t help but pat his boy Bucky on the back. You held back a chuckle as Bucky’s smile grew as Steve congratulated him on becoming a dad.

“I’m glad you get the chance.”

“Thanks, Steve.”

Tony smirked and shook his head at the two, eyes peering over to you. “So, you got knocked up, huh? Is that why the two of you left?

“Great tact, Tony.” Sam shook his head and looked at you. “Can’t say I don’t blame the two of you. Kinda crazy to think you can raise a kid in this environment. How far along are you?”

“Six months and counting,” you answered, trying to catch Nat’s attention, but her eyes were set to the ground. “I…I have a sonogram if anyone is interested…”

This got your best friend’s attention and her head snapped up to reveal a brilliant smile. “Let me see my nephew or niece.”

“Nephew,” Bucky corrected her, causing the rest of the group to react.

“A boy! Oh, man, the kid’s going to be spoiled,” Sam laughed.

“I call Godfather,” Tony declared, much to Steve’s dismay.

“Wow, guys,” he whistled, pulling his longtime friend into a hug. “Congratulations.”

A wave of relief hit flowed over you at the warm reception of your child, Nat fawning over the photo you handed over. She sighed contently and asked if she could have the copy.

“Yeah, we have a whole bunch.”

“So, what are you going to name him?”

Bucky looked at you before giving Sam a shrug. “We haven’t decided yet.”

“Well, nonetheless,” Steve spoke up, a wide smile on his face. “A new baby is a great cause for celebration.”

You laughed as Nat hugged you tightly, her hand all over your belly. “I can’t believe you let Bucky knock you up.”

Before you could rebuttal, a familiar voice came from across the room and when you looked up, your heart dropped in panic.

“Who got who knocked up,” Clint asked, clearly looking like he just got up from a nap.

Your eyes darted to Bucky, who kept a warm smile on his face – he always had a better poker face than you, made it hard to play cards against him.

“These two runaways,” Tony explained.

The archer slowly dragged his eyes from Bucky to you and down to your swollen stomach, his eyes widening in disbelief.

“You’re…. pregnant?”


	4. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The father is revealed!

Clint’s face fell as he repeated the question, until Nat asked if he had his hearing aid on. He played it off with a laugh and stumbled over to her, snatching the sonogram from her hands. You could feel Bucky’s gaze on you, calling for you to look at him, but you were too afraid. One look from him and you would burst into tears and blow the whole thing. Instead, you watched Clint carefully as he examined the sonogram, while Tony clapped his hands and announced it was lunch time.

“We have to feed the little bruiser,” he said, causing Clint to look up from the photo.

“It’s a boy?”

“Yeah,” you answered quietly, hating how he was finding out this way. “Bucky and I haven’t come up with a name just yet.”

Your words were carefully drawn out, hoping he got the hint, but Clint was quiet as the rest of the group moved to the table. Natasha snatched back the photo and declared that she was going to be the greatest aunt alive.

“I mean, I’m already an aunt, right Barton,” she smiled, but the archer was lost in thought. “Clint.”

“Sorry,” he cleared his throat and smiled at his friend. “You’re a great aunt, Nat.”

Bucky called to you from the table and you went to him, holding back the nerves as you took the place next to him. Your knees touched his and he placed a hand on your thigh, giving you a supportive squeeze. Smiling at him, he gave you a look that said everything would be fine and you nodded subtly as everyone came to the table. Everyone settled in and started eating, chitchatting away and asking a million and one questions about Seattle and the baby. Clint remained quiet, barely eating.

“So, when are you all moving back?”

Bucky and you glanced over at Natasha, the two of you sharing a knowing look.

Her eyes narrowed and she repeated her question until you sighed.

“Nat, we aren’t moving back.”

“I don’t blame you,” Sam inputted, ignoring a glare from Natasha.

“But we are your family,” she insisted, placing both hands on the table. “We can help out.”

“Listen, guys,” Bucky spoke up, drawing a hand through his hair. “We want the kid to have a normal life, no Avenger stuff or any of that.”

“Buck’s right,” you added, dodging Clint’s eyes on you. “We just want all of your support and understanding.”

Your words held more air to them as they left your mouth and you hoped the message was clear, you just wanted to move on and get ready for your son’s arrival. The room was silent for a moment until Tony cleared his throat and held up his glass of water.

“We get it, guys, we do,” he offered with a grin.

“Tony’s right,” Steve said, smiling over at Bucky and you. “You guys have the right to make whatever choice you want for your child. We’re just excited for you two.”

“Fine.” Nat mused, holding back a smile. “I get to visit once he’s born.”

“I would love that,” you grinned, daring to gaze over to Clint. His eyes met yours, but he looked lost in his own world as Tony called for a toast. Everyone held up their glasses of water and the billionaire smirked.

“To the new parents.”

….

You sulked into the memory foam mattress and held up your feet in the air. They were swollen and your back was aching, and all you wanted to do was sleep for sixteen hours straight. Bucky came out of the bathroom and chuckled when he saw you trying to touch your toes.

“That’s what probably got you in this trouble in the first place,” he teased.

“Not funny,” you pouted, asking if he could come help. “I’ve fallen and can’t get up.”

Bucky busted into a warm laugh and walked over to the bed.

“Your feet are swollen, you need to take it easy,” he advised, grabbing a hold of your ankles. He gently moved them down against his chest and started to massage your feet. “So, are we going to talk about the fact that he’s here.”

“I swear I thought he wasn’t.”

“Hey, I’m not blaming you,” he frowned.

“I know, I just…I was shocked to see him. I feel like a such an asshole.”

“Makes two of us.”

You looked up over at Bucky and was about to ask if he could draw you a bath when a sharp knock came from the other side of the bedroom door. The two of you froze and you motioned for him to get the door, moving your feet down from his hands. Sitting up, you watched with eager eyes as Bucky walked over to the door and opened it slightly.

“Hey, Clint.”

You heart dropped as you scooted to the edge of the bed, feet planted firmly into the carpet. He looked pissed, but mostly exhausted as he marched into the middle of the room. Bucky closed the door and started to talk, but Clint cut him off by kneeling in front of you. His eyes were glued to your stomach and you knew he knew – he played the snarky, sometimes clueless part, but he was a smart man.

His eyes softened, but his mouth stayed firmly shut, as if he was unable to speak. Instead he held up his hands and started to sign.

It’s my baby, isn’t it?

Tears formed in your eyes, because six months ago things had gotten out of hand. Two careless adults divulged in an act of secrecy and foolishness. You gazed over Clint’s shoulder to Bucky, who tucked his hands into his jeans and nodded for you to go on. So, you inhaled deeply and looked into Clint’s eyes as you signed back to him.

Yes.


	5. Afterdark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little implied smut.

Clint sat beside you, the cool night breeze hitting your skin. You shivered and he offered up his jacket, not waiting for an answer as he took it off and draped it over your shoulders. The two of you sat quietly on the second level balcony; everyone was sound asleep and Bucky had promised to wait up when you asked him to before you left with Clint to talk. You considered the vastness that was nighttime and listened to the soft sounds of Clint breathing, not trying to go back to the time and that morning. When after everything went down, in your hotel room, all you could do was lie awake as the sun came up – listening to Clint’s breathing. You remembered the guilt and embarrassment you felt as he moved in his sleep, unconsciously throwing an arm around your waist. His skin warm against yours and you remembered thinking it was the loneliness. Blamed the loneliness for the indiscretion, the carelessness the two of you stirred up.

You remembered it all, as if it was just yesterday.

“So, I’m going to be dad.”

“Clint, you’re already a dad,” you pointed out and he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I thought you were home.”

He remained quiet for a second before he spoke again. “That was you on the phone earlier, wasn’t it?”

“I was on the plane,” you explained. “I heard the kids, so I thought…”

“Laura sent me a video of the kids, I was watching it,” Clint said, running a hand over his face. “Man, I…. I don’t know what to say.”

Inhaling, you said it was okay. “We’re going to be fine. You don’t have to do anything, Barton. I know what it means for you. You have a real family to think of.”

“Bullshit,” he muttered. He turned to face you, a little anger in his eyes. “I’m not going to abandon my son.”

Closing your eyes, you pulled away when his hand touched yours. “We did a horrible thing, Clint. This wasn’t some one-night mistake. We knew this was going to happen, it was in the making for weeks.”

“It just happened,” he said, moving off the bench to kneel in front of you. He looked so sad in the moonlight and all you could think about was Laura, his kids, his real life. Tears fell down your face as he hesitated for a moment before placing a hand on your belly. The baby kicked and you lost it, sobbing heavily into your hands. Clint quickly sat back next to you, placed his arm around your shoulder and held you as you cried.

“It just happened,” he repeated, but you shook your head through the tears.

“No! It didn’t! We knew it was going to happen! All those weeks on that fucking mission,” you cried, jerking from under his touch. “We fucked up, Clint. You should have never come up to me at the bar and I should have said no to getting fresh air. Fuck fresh air.”

Clint let out a defeated chuckle and you rolled our eyes, sniffling as you placed a hand on your stomach. “I will always regret the way this happened, but I will never regret my son.”

“Our son.”

“We…can’t do this,” you murmured, dodging his hand. He watched as you got up from the bench, wiping your eyes with a finger. “You have a family, Clint. We made one mistake and I can’t let you fall because of it. Your kids deserve better, Laura deserves better.”

“I know,” he sulked, eyes to the ground. “I just…he’s my son, Y/N. What am I supposed to do? Let some other guy raise him?”

“Bucky isn’t some other guy,” you protested, setting a hand on your stomach. “He’s stepping up to do the right thing and that’s how it’s going to be.”

“Why would he want to do this?”

Giving a weak smile, you shrugged. “Bucky just wants a chance at a normal life and he saw that opportunity in our blunder.”

He looked up at you, hands clasped in front of him. You couldn’t help but reach out to him and when he took it, you didn’t pull back this time.

“It’s going to be okay, Clint. It’s going to be okay.”

…..

You walked into Bucky’s room and saw the man lounging on the bed, tucked under the covers with a baby book in hand. He looked up from his reading and asked how it went, throwing back the covers to get up from the bed. Shaking your head, you started to cry and he rushed to you, pulling you into his arms. He rubbed your back and cradled your neck, pressing your body into his. You felt safe and all you wanted to do was go back to Seattle and forget all about this day. You wanted it to be just the three of you and you knew it was unfair and wrong and built on a lie, but still.

“Say the word and we’re on a plane within the hour,” he whispered, pulling away so he could see your face. “Say the word and we’ll run the hell away from here.”

Eyes wet, you reached up to his face and leaned into kiss him. Bucky sighed contently as your mouth danced against his and arousal burned up from your toes, until you couldn’t handle it.

“Please,” you begged.

Bucky moaned into your mouth and both of you moved to the bed. He carefully helped you out of your clothes, tossing Barton’s jacket onto the floor. He kept giving you soft kisses as you shimmied out of your bottoms and he chuckled when you pushed him onto the bed. Sitting on the edge, he moved you down onto his lap. Your breasts were full and he touched them carefully, because he had read in the book that they could be tender.

You stared at him as he leaned forward to place a kiss on your chest and felt unworthy of his love. A woman impregnated by a married man, a woman who lied to her friends, a woman who deserved nothing, but was given everything by him. Still, as his hands roamed your body and held you so close to his, you knew you loved him. Even if the two of you had come together from a lie, this was real, it had to be.

“Bucky,” you whispered, asking for his attention.

He gazed up at you, hand touching your neck. “We don’t have to…”

“No, I want to. It’s just….” you voice trailed off, eyes darting away from his hold, but he grabbed your chin lightly and asked what was wrong.

“Nothing, I just love you.”

Bucky’s entire face lit up and he chuckled, fingers letting go of your chin. “I love you too.”


	6. Unfolding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Tony found out about Bucky and your dirty little secret.

The facility was mostly quiet as you left the bedroom, Bucky had gotten up earlier and decided to let you sleep in. It was noon when you woke up, feeling a little sluggish as you took a shower and got dressed for the day. After last night, sleeping with Bucky felt right and you knew telling him you loved him was the raw truth. Feeling a bit better after the emotional talk with Clint, you headed to the kitchen. You heard soft murmuring as you walked into the kitchen; it was Tony, cursing under his breath as he poured himself some coffee.

“Is Bucky around?”

“No,” he said, not looking up from his mug. Tony finally looked up at you, a soft smile on his face as his eyes moved down to your stomach. “He’s in the gym with Steve. How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay, hungry.”

“Let me make you something,” he insisted.

So, you took a seat and watched as the billionaire made avocado toast with poach egg for you. He asked if you wanted some orange juice and you said no, it had too much sugar. He offered just plain water and you said yes, getting a little eye roll from the man.

“Alright, don’t say I never did anything for you,” he cooed, setting the plate down in front of you. He took a seat across from the table and continued to drink his coffee. You wiggled happily in your seat as you started to eat, the delicious food melting against your tongue.

“I love food,” you sighed.

Tony laughed, but his smile slowly faded. You recognized the pain expression on his face, so you placed down the toast and asked what was wrong.

“Discretion is not my usual forte,” he stated cautiously, pushing the mug away from him. “You know I love the drama, but…”

“What is it, Tony.”

“I saw you last night with Barton,” he confessed, a weak grin on his face. You sat there shocked and feeling like an idiot. If anyone was going to figure it out, the whole debacle of your life, it would be Tony Stark. “I was walking by, saw you two outside the balcony, looking rather cozy.”

“It isn’t what you think,” you urged, shifting in your seat. You wanted to kick yourself for going out there with Clint, the two of you should have just left the facility. “What were you doing wondering the halls like the ghost of Christmas past?”

“You don’t even know what I think, and look at you trying to change the subject,” he joked, but the look on your face made him sigh. “Listen, I don’t know what the hell is going on, but my bet is on the fact that baby isn’t Barnes’.”

Your heart dropped in fear, but this was Tony. He knew a thing or two about secrets, and he had to know what it meant if this got out.

“Tony…”

“Don’t worry, kid,” he smiled, reaching for his mug again. “I’m not going to get in the way of someone’s family, believe me, I wouldn’t do that.”

Unsure if he meant Clint’s family or the one Bucky and you had formed, you just sighed in relief and thanked him.

“What for?” he asked with a mischievous smirk. “The breakfast? I make good breakfast, don’t’ I?”

….

You strolled into the gym, after a lengthy conversation with Tony after admitting he made a great breakfast. Unable to hold back, you told him everything and he just listened; no snide remarks or jokes, it was a little unsettling to be honest. In the end, after everything was said, Tony promised his lips were sealed.

“I want to kick Barton’s ass though,” he mused, but the death stare you sent him washed away those thoughts.

“Believe me, it was both our faults,” you muttered, getting up to leave. 

Tony stared up at you and shrugged. “Only takes two to tango, huh.”

The gym was suspiciously quiet, every step revealed that it was empty. Sighing, you walked over to one of the treadmills and placed your hand on the railing, ready to call out to FRIDAY to ask where Bucky was, but then two low voices came seeping from the locker room. Curious, you left the treadmill and started toward the room, realizing the tones were not friendly at all. Whispered words that were harsh and as you got to the door, the voices revealed themselves to be Bucky and Steve.

“You got to be kidding me, man,” Steve sighed.

“Listen, I’m telling you this because you’re my brother and I can’t keep lying to you. Besides,” Bucky said, a smile on his face when you peeked around the wall to see them two standing together in their gym attire. “you were happy for me before, nothing has to change.”

“Buck, that baby is Clint’s. I would have been better off not knowing.”

Taking a deep breath, something you were doing a lot of lately, you walked around the corner and revealed yourself. Steve’s eyes immediately dropped to your stomach and Bucky gave you a look that said, ‘my bad’, but you weren’t mad at him.

“Steve, I know this sucks, believe me, but we have it figured out,” you promised, moving next to Buck. “We just need you to keep this between us and Tony.”

Bucky’s eyes widen and he groaned. “Tony?”

“I’ll explain later,” you promised Bucky, eyes glued to Steve. You knew him well enough to know he was contemplating everything and you knew the two of you were asking a lot, but he kept worse things a secret and as horrible as that was, you were hoping he’d remember that. “Please, Steve.”

His blue eyes flickered from Bucky to you. “I have to know something…”

“He knows,” you assured him, resting a hand on your stomach. “Clint knows.”

“So, Tony and I have to pretend you two didn’t…”

“STEVE.” Bucky growled, giving his friend a hard stare. “Don’t make her feel bad.”

“I feel it enough,” you said, giving a helpless shrug. “Believe me, Clint and I are fully aware that we are assholes and what we did was selfish and stupid.”

“I’m sorry,” Steve apologized, eyes glued to the ground. “I just wish Bucky and you were doing this under different circumstances.”

“Doesn’t change a thing,” Bucky piped up, his arm snaking around your waist. “This kid is mine and I’m going to love him like my own and you’re either with us or not. At the end of the day, we’re going back to Seattle to start our family, it would be nice to have your blessing.”

Feeling a heat of warmth foaming from your toes at Bucky’s assert words, pride beamed from your heart and you knew how lucky you were that he loved you. Steve watched as Bucky pressed a kiss onto your forehead and he couldn’t help but smile.

“Okay,” he said, nodding warmly. “I’m with you guys.”


	7. Emotions

You laid in bed, Bucky and Steve had gone out for a bit. Figuring it was a guy thing and certain Bucky was going to make sure Steve was going to keep things under wraps, you declined when Bucky asked if you wanted to join them. Instead, you decided to keep quiet in his room. Besides, you were feeling a bit drained after the talk with Tony and Steve. Gazing up at the ceiling, you rubbed a hand over your hill and asked FRIDAY if she could let you know when Bucky returned.

“Of course.”

“Thank you.”

Closing your eyes, you thought of all the wonderful things a new baby would bring. The first smile, giggle, walk, all of it – it would be worth it. It would be, after the way things happened and the hurt to come, you just imagine Bucky holding your son and everything felt better. He was going to be a great dad, he was and you were happy to give him that.

Getting up from the bed, you looked around the room and found Clint’s jacket on the floor. Sighing, you stretched down to get it and yelped when the baby kicked you on the ribs.

“Relax, okay?”

Smiling, you asked FRIDAY where Barton was.

“In the kitchen.”

“Oh good, I think we can go for more food.”

……

Clint stood over the kitchen island making himself a sandwich, eyebrows furrowed as he slapped some mayo on a slice of bread. You watched from the doorway until he looked up and gave a haphazard smile, asking if you were hungry.

“Yeah, the kid is going crazy.”

Walking into the kitchen, you placed his jacket on one of the chairs. “Brought this back.”

“Uh, yeah. Thanks. Mayo?”

“God no,” you laughed, taking a seat at the counter. “Bucky once fed me a sandwich with a bit of mayo and I proceeded to throw up for ten minutes straight.”

Clint laughed. “Yeah, Laura wasn’t too fond of mayo too.”

The two of you feel silent at the mention of Laura’s name, the guilt just tensed in the air and all you could do was stare at the counter. Neither of you thought of her that night or the weeks leading to the night; it wasn’t like the two of you were these terrible people, but you were. There was no hiding that now, and for the first time since you landed in New York, you were regretting ever leaving the apartment. Clint didn’t speak, but continued to make the sandwiches, offering you a mayo free one and a glass of chocolate milk.

“Ah, you remembered,” you laughed lowly, grabbing the glass.

It was a morning ritual while on missions; the two of you were late sleepers and the others always had breakfast before seven. So when Clint and you would come out of your mutual hotel rooms, the two of you would get breakfast together. He would always laugh when you ordered chocolate milk instead of coffee and teased you endlessly in front of the others. It was nice like that, the friendship and you wished it would have stayed that way.

“It’s confusing, Clint,” you said quietly, wondering if he heard it. When he didn’t look up from his sandwich, you figured he didn’t hear until he spoke, eyes glued to the counter.

“I know, it’s like we did this terrible thing and I hate myself for it. I hate myself, but as soon as I saw that you were pregnant, I just knew that was my kid and I was happy.”

Holding back tears, you lifted the sandwich off the plate and took a bite – preventing yourself from crying like a hormonal pregnant lady.

“It feels wrong to be happy, Y/N,” he continued, finally gazing up to you. His eyes met yours with pain and blame, and all you could do was sympathize.

“I get it Clint, I do, but we can’t do this.”

“Why the hell not?”

Dropping the sandwich on the plate and pushing it away, you got up from the stool. “CLINT, YOU HAVE A FAMILY. A WIFE AND KIDS! WE ARE NOT DOING THIS!”

“THAT’S NOT RIGHT,” he shouted back, storming around the counter to you. He took a moment to calm down before grabbing you lightly by the shoulders. “We can figure this out, Laura will understand.”

“On what planet?” you laughed, jerking from his hands. “We can’t do this, you know that. I know that. This is not your son, this is Bucky’s and that’s all there is to it.”

Shame washed over you as Clint’s eyes began to glisten and you opened your mouth to speak, but FRIDAY announced Bucky’s arrival back at the facility.

Like a godsend, that man.

“I have to go,” you whispered. “We’re leaving tomorrow.”

“You can’t…”

“We are, I have a doctor’s appointment in two days.”

Clint nodded and asked if the baby was okay.

“Yeah, he’s healthy,” you answered, thanking him for the sandwich as you picked it off the plate. “I got to go see Bucky.”

“Yeah, of course. But this isn’t over.”

“Come on, Clint…”

“No,” he argued, shoulders slumped. “How am I supposed to live with myself knowing my kid is out there?”

Closing your eyes for a moment, you sighed and reopened them. “You’re going to go home to Laura and the kids, you’re going to continue to be the great father and husband you have always been. The best I can do is Uncle Clint, that’s it.”

“It’s unfair.”

“A lot of things are unfair, do you think this,” you pointed to your belly, near tears. “is fair to Laura? To your kids? It isn’t. I don’t want them looking at you any different than they do now.”

“And what about you?”

Confused, you held the sandwich tightly and asked what he meant.

Clint gave a weak smile. “The two times we talked, it was always about what was right for me. So, what about you? I care about you, you are my friend, hell you’ve been like a best friend to me. You’re carrying my kid, that’s my kid in there and no matter who raises him, that will never change.”

You gave the man a hard stare and knew it was true, he was the biological father. He was the other half of your son’s DNA, but that’s all he could be. You weren’t sure what would happen if Laura found out, but you didn’t want to take that chance. It wasn’t like you were afraid to face her, hell, you deserve to be confronted by the woman whose home you wrecked, but all you could do was think of Clint.

Walking back to the counter, you placed the sandwich down on the plate; you weren’t feeling too hungry. Clint stood close by, his hand reached for your shoulder and you cried. A quiet cry, hands flat on the counter as his hands rubbed your shoulder.

“We can figure this out,” he promised, but all you could do was cry until a soothing voice came from the doorway.

“I got her, Clint.”

Bucky gave the man a quick nod as he pulled you into his arms. Clint’s eyes darted to Steve, who was lingering near the door way. He gave the man a quick nod before making his exit through the other door that lead to the living room. Steve excused himself too, leaving Bucky and you alone.

“You okay?”

Pulling from his chest, you nodded. “Yeah, but I’m hungry again.”

Bucky laughed softly and pressed a kiss onto your forehead. “Alright, baby, let’s get you some food.”


	8. Shopping

“I’m pregnant, Buck.”

“Pregnant?”

“Yeah, you know a baby…”

Bucky’s eyes widen and he moved down next to you on the bed, sliding his hand around your shoulder.

“Are you okay?”

Tears fell down your face and you shook your head no. “This was a mistake…”

“No, no,” he hushed you, grabbing you by the chin and turning your head to face him. “You have a chance to have a normal life, like you’ve talked about. Don’t you want that?”

“Buck, I’m gonna be a single mom. I can’t do this…”

“You can do whatever you want.”

“It’s Clint’s baby…”

You waited then, for the judgement to come rolling in but all Bucky did was sigh and pull you into his chest. His metal hand rubbed up and down your back and he promised it was going to be okay.

“How, Buck?”

“Because,” he whispered, pressing a kiss onto your head. “I’m going to take care of the two of you, don’t worry about it. I got you.”

…..

You woke up to Bucky moving around the room, getting ready for the day; he was quiet, but you were a light sleeper. Peeking from your blanket, you saw him shirtless holding two shirts in hand – one was blue and the other was white.

“The blue one looks good on you.”

He smiled fondly over at you and tossed the white shirt aside, putting on the blue one. “Thanks, baby. So, I have some interesting news.”

“Oh, good, because we need more interesting in our lives,” you joked, sitting up against the headboard.

Ignoring your snide remark, he asked if you remembered that hardware store by the apartment. You said yes and asked why.

“Well, I applied for a job there a while ago and they called me this morning,” he explained with a wide smile. “I start work next week.”

“OH MY GOD,” you squealed, trying to stumble out of bed.

Bucky laughed and rushed to your side, helping your feet detangle from the sheets. You laughed as he pushed you down back on the bed and hovered over your body. His smile was glorious, hair falling over his face, so you reached up to tuck the strands behind his ear.

“I’m proud of you, Barnes.”

He grinned and leaned down to kiss you. “I’m proud of us.”

“Oh, yes,” you laughed, rolling your eyes. “A homewrecker and a former assassin.”

Bucky laughed, because you were the only one that could get away with calling him that. “Come on, we’re two people making the most of a sticky situation and I think we should be happy, I’m happy. Are you happy?”

Looking up into his eyes, so soft and inviting, you smiled. “Yeah, James, I’m happy and I’ll be happier when I see you in that cute green apron they make all the employees wear at the hardware store.”

The corner of his eyes crinkled as he chuckled, his body moving down beside you. He pulled you into his side and looked over at you.

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” you mused back, attempting to sit up. “But I better get ready, I promised Natasha she could take me out for some baby shopping.”

“Want me to run you a quick bath?”

Glancing down at Bucky, you smiled. “No, but you can join me for a quick shower.”

“Can I pretend I didn’t already take one?”

You laughed and nodded. “Come on then.”

…..

“Two Avengers walk into a Target…”

“Oh, you got jokes,” Natasha teased as she pushed the shopping cart down toward the baby section of the store. You walked beside her, eating a hot dog in leggings and a loose blouse. She led the way and her face lit up when she saw all the baby stuff. You watched as she moved ahead and started toward the baby boy section, immediately tossing things into the cart.

“Slow your roll,” you called out, waddling after her. “Our apartment isn’t huge, so you can’t send us home with bags and bags of stuff.”

“Sorry, I can’t hear you,” Nat answered, holding up two outfit. “Which one?”

You pointed to the blue overalls and she smiled, placing it in the cart. “So, what’s the deal with Bucky and you? I mean, seemed out of nowhere…”

Pretending to be invested in some onesies, you shrugged. “It just happened, honestly.”

Natasha moved her focus to you and asked if you loved him. “Seriously, do you?”

Smiling, you waved a pair of onesies in the air and proceeded to throw them in the cart. “Yeah, I love him.”

“Wow,” she chuckled. “Wasn’t expecting that answer, but I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks, Nat,” you said quietly, eyes darting from her gaze, because you were ashamed. You wondered if she’d be happy for you if she knew the truth, especially since she was Auntie Nat to Clint’s kids and Laura adored her. How would she feel about you then?

“Okay, so you finish that hot dog and let’s go look at some cribs.”

Breaking from your thoughts, you smiled over at her. “Tony called the crib already, Pepper texted me about some options.”

“Those two,” Nat muttered, tilting her head in thought. “We’ll let’s just see what else they have here and then we can get you a proper lunch. We have to be back before the big dinner.”

Right, the big dinner.

It was Steve’s idea, a family dinner before Bucky and you left back to Seattle in the morning. It sounded nice and you were grateful to have a friend like Steve, like all of them and it was nice to be around them again. But you still had the guilt and you wondered if it would ever go away.

“Hey, preggers you okay?”

Managing a grin, you said yeah to Nat and pointed to the bottle aisle. “Let’s go see what we can find.”


	9. Dinner

“How was shopping? Did Natasha and you find anything good?”

You looked up from the spinach salad Pepper had prepared for you; a ‘pre-dinner snack’ she had proclaimed with a wink. She was standing beside Tony, who didn’t seem too invested in the conversation.

Tossing a cherry tomato into your mouth, you nodded. “She bought me a ton of clothes and little stuff I might need.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to have a baby shower?”

“I don’t think so, Pepper. I mean with Buck and I living across the country, it just seems like a hassle. Besides I can’t fly out during my third trimester.”

“Says who,” Tony piped up.

“My doctor,” you quipped back. “You want to call her up?”

He smiled then and rolled his eyes, asking FRIDAY to call everyone to the dining room. “Tell those delinquents that dinner is ready.”

Smiling at the man, you turned to Pepper and asked how the wedding plans were going.

“Oh, they are going,” she chuckled, tilting her head in Tony’s direction. “This one is a diva.”

“I sure am.”

“Anyway, have you decided on what crib you’d like us to get you? No pressure or anything,” Pepper added quickly, giving you a warm smile.

“Yeah,” you grinned, pushing away the bowl. “We really liked the dark cherry wood one, it’s going to be perfect in our apartment.”

“For god sakes,” Tony groaned, holding a pile of utensils in hand. “Let me buy you two a house, I can afford it.”

Your eyes went wide and Pepper sighed, patting her man’s back gently. “Leave the kids alone, Tony.”

“Kids,” he huffed. “Barnes is older than me, by decades.”

Holding back a smile, you just rubbed your stomach and chuckled.

“He’s going to make a great father,” Pepper said, turning around to grab some cloth napkins from the draw next to the sink. “That baby of yours is going to be a looker – with his eyes and your smile.”

Your face dropped and you looked to Tony, whose mouthed formed a sympathetic smile. I’m sorry, he mouthed and you shrugged, holding onto a brave face. It made you sad, when you thought about it too much; that the baby would not look like Bucky at all. No, he was going to look like his biological father; perhaps he’ll have Clint’s eyes or nose, maybe even his goofy smile. But your son would never have any physical features of the man you love and it was upsetting, but that’s what you had to deal with.

That was your truth.

“Hey, you are feeling okay, honey?”

Blinking a few times, you looked to Pepper and smiled. “Yeah, I’m just ready for dinner.”

….

The table was decorated with Italian heaven; pasta upon pasta, marvelous sauces, garlic bread, and tons of salad to go around. You were sitting in between Bucky and Steve, while Clint sat next to Nat. Pepper and Tony each had an end at the table and everyone was chitchatting about missions. You thought you’d be a bit jealous, but you weren’t and you stole a look at Bucky, relief flooded over you. He sat there listening to Tony and smiling, but not a hint of sorrow for his retired job graced his face and you were grateful.

“So, you two don’t plan on ever coming back to the action?”

Tony questioned, right eyebrow lifted as he reached for his glass of wine. “Not even for a little while?”

“I won’t speak for the both of us,” Bucky piped up, reaching a hand under the table for yours. “but I’m ready to put the fighting behind me. I just want a normal life.”

“Me too,” you added, ignoring the glare Clint was sending from across the table.

“It works for Barton,” Natasha reasoned.

“Okay, that’s enough with the work talk,” Steve announced, raising his glass. “Let’s just enjoy this time together, cheers to family.”

While everyone mimicked the Captain, your eyes wandered to Clint; who looked miserable as he raised his glass. His eyes locked with yours and they said so much; sorry, please, and help. It was all there and you had this sinking feeling that he was not going to let this go. He was going to push and push until you let up, and the fallout, it was going to crush you.

“To family.”

…

Two hours later, Pepper had left to get ready for a meeting in the morning, of course not without promising to have that crib sent over to your apartment as soon as Bucky and you flew back to Seattle. Natasha disappeared with a plate of food for Bruce, who was holed up in his lab; leaving everyone who knew Clint was the father of your son, alone.

Together.

You stuffed a beef ravioli in your mouth, as Steve rattled off about baseball game, hardly meeting eye contact with Clint. He was just sitting there, forking around his food, barely listening to what Bucky and Steve were talking about. Tony, well, he was sitting at the head of the table looking all too amused, giving his cell a look every so often.

“Man, I hope they make it to the playoffs this year,” Steve sighed, pushing his chair back. He thanked Tony for providing dinner and started picking up the empty plates, letting you know that if you were still eating to take your time.

“No, I’m stuffed,” you answered, leaning back into your chair. “It was delicious, thanks Tony.”

“Anything for the little kiddo,” he replied, leaning his elbows on the table. “Man, I can’t believe you’re pregnant. It just seems like yesterday you joined the team.”

Steve laughed as he disappeared with a handful of dishes toward the kitchen and you glanced at Bucky, who got up from his chair. He stretched and leaned down to press a kiss on top of your head, saying he was going to help Steve. Nodding, you turned your attention back to Stark.

“Yeah, it’s been a crazy few years. I’m going to miss working with you guys.”

“You’ll be missed. No one can pack a punch like you,” Tony joked, catching Clint’s gaze. “or get this guy to clean up after himself.”

Sensing that the man was trying to elevate the tension, you chuckled and nodded to the archer. “He is sort of a slob, isn’t he?”

For a moment you thought you saw a gleam of a smile pulling from Clint’s mouth, but as quick as it appeared, it was gone. Instead he lifted his chin up and stared at you, clearly thinking of a million things to say; every word stinging the tip of his tongue. So you opened your mouth to defuse the situation, but Clint slammed his hand on the table; causing you to jump and Tony’s face to drop.

“Are we just going to pretend like everything is normal?”

“Barton, watch it.”

“Tony this isn’t your damn concern,” Clint remarked, resting his elbows on the table. His attention was on you and you alone. “That is my son. MY SON.”

“No,” you argued back, voice low and tight.

“Don’t do this to me,” he begged, but you just looked away, sending a pleading look to Tony.

“Listen, this is complicated, obviously,” Tony stated coolly. “But she’s only thinking of you, Clint. You have to see that.”

“He’s right,” you piped up, slowly getting up from your chair. Tears started to form in the corners of your eyes and quickly wiped at them. “You have a family, I’m not going to let you lose that.”

Jumping up, Clint leaned his palms on the table. “You’re my family too now. That is my son and I’m not letting this go.”

You stared at him, really took in the look in his eyes and knew he was serious; and it pissed you off. He was going to ruin everything, all of it, because he wanted to do the right thing. Because he was Clint and that was his MO. He was a good guy that made a mistake, and you were tired of trying to convince him that it was okay. That you wanted him to go to Laura and his kids with a clean heart; they deserved that much.

“You need to think about your kids,” Tony reasoned, but Clint shook his head.

“I am! I’m thinking about my son!”

“He’s not your son,” you argued back. “We made a mistake Clint! We did and know we have to deal with the outcome and this is the solution I’m picking.”

“How the hell is that fair,” he questioned, running a hand over his face. “How do I go on with my life?”

“Maybe you should have thought of that before, huh?”

“Tony,” you snapped, shaking your head. “We both made a decision that night, we both did.”

Silencing the man, you sighed. “I don’t know what else to tell you Clint.”

“Tell me I get to be in my son’s life! You don’t get to make this decision on your own.” His voice faded as he dipped his head down. “And don’t give me that Uncle Clint bullshit. Just don’t.”

Your heart ached to see your friend in this state, a state you were putting him in, but this had to end. It had to, so you looked at Tony and took a deep breath before asking if he had his private jet available. He said yes and asked why.

“We’re taking a trip to Clint’s house, we’re going to tell Laura about the baby.”

Clint’s head snapped up, his eyes wide and you saw it; fear, regret, uncertainty in them and you sighed.

“There you go, there’s your answer, Clint,” you said, throwing your hand in the air. “You know what that would mean, what you would lose and you felt it for a split second, didn’t you?”

He didn’t answer, but he didn’t need to – his silence spoke volumes.

“That’s what I thought. I’m done here,” you declared, grabbing your plate off the table. Watching Clint, you waited for him to meet your gaze. “We’re done here.”


	10. Consideration

The hurt in Clint’s eyes killed you, but you had to make him see it wasn’t worth losing everything in the end. He had his three kids, he had his wife, and he had his home – what more did he want?

Bucky was going to help you raise the baby, Bucky will be the father, and he will be great.

Why couldn’t he see that?

Looking down at the plate in your hand, you sighed and started walking off to the kitchen when you heard it. Heard Clint call you selfish under his breath and you turned slowly, gripping the plate like it was your last life line.

“I’m selfish?” You scoffed, storming back to the table, handing off the plate to Tony. “You want to break your family’s heart because you want to do the right thing! You’re the selfish one, Clint!”

He stood straight, hands at his side.

Oh, you could tell he was angry, but so were you.

“We did this together, not just me, not just you,” he stated through his teeth. “We made that decision that night at the bar.”

“Wait, in Germany?”

Ignoring Tony’s comment, you shook your head. “We did what we did and I’m sorry, I regret it, but I don’t regret my son. I just want to do what’s best for him.”

“You have no idea what that means, I’ve been a parent a lot longer than you. Talk to me in a couple of years, you’ll get it then.”

“Fuck you, Barton.”

His jaw tightened, but before he could say another word, Bucky walked into the room – Steve trailing behind him.

“That’s enough,” he demanded, moving to your side. Steve walked over to Barton and grabbed him by the shoulders.

“Come on, man, this isn’t helping the situation,” he reasoned, but Clint pushed him off and stormed out of the room.

Letting out a breath you had been holding in, you stared down at your stomach. Bucky and you should have never come home, the two of you were doing great in Seattle. All you wanted was to be back at the apartment, watching horrible reality tv while Bucky cooked lunch. Or watching him paint the nursey that light green the two of you decided on, anywhere but here.

“I know our flight is for early morning, but we’re leaving tonight.” Bucky announced and you looked over to him. He smiled at you and reached down for your hand as he addressed his friends. “I know the baggage we brought and I think it would best if we just left.”

“You don’t have to,” Steve argued, but Tony sighed and nodded.

“I’ll talk some sense into Barton,” he promised, chuckling when you started walking to him. He held out his hands and smiled warmly. “Come here, sappy pants.”

Letting him embrace you, you thanked him and kissed his cheek. You knew Tony was someone you could always count on, hell, he was the one that invited you to join the Avengers and you knew he’d have your back.

“Just go home with Barnes, go have that baby and be happy,” he insisted, pulling back so he could look at you. “We’ll visit, Pepper and I, soon. Maybe even take you two to go look at houses?”

He shrugged innocently and all you could do was laugh. “Maybe.”

“You’ll get there,” he promised. “Listen, if you’re deadest on leaving tonight, take my jet. I’ll have Happy make the arrangements.”

“Thanks, Tony,” Bucky said. “It’s for the best.”

….

You packed quietly, Bucky had gone back downstairs to get the arrangements from Tony, but not before asking if you were sure you wanted to leave. You wanted to, so he kissed you softly, letting his hands fall to the ‘hill’ and he smiled.

“We’re going to be fine, baby.”

“I know.”

Now you were alone, considering everything that happened at dinner. It wasn’t like you didn’t understand what Clint was going through or what he had said, you did, but it just wasn’t going to fly like that. You cared about him, you loved him and just wanted what was best for everyone. In what lifetime would Laura be okay with her husband having a child with another woman? One of his teammates, nonetheless. This wasn’t some Hallmark special, this was real life, with real consequences.

A knock on the bedroom door interrupted your thoughts and you looked up from the bag just as Steve poked his head in, he asked if you had a minute and you nodded. He walked in, closing the door quietly behind him – shoving his hands in the pockets of his jeans, he made his way to the bed and asked if he could sit. You said yes and continued to pack until he finally cleared his throat.

“So, I’ve come as an unbiased friend…”

“Oh, great, this is going to be fun,” you teased, tossing down Bucky’s shirt to look at the man. “What is it Steve?”

“Bucky and I heard the whole exchange between Clint and you go down, he wanted to interrupt sooner, but I told him the two of you had to work it out.”

“You agree with Clint, don’t you?”

“I just think the two of you could come to a compromise,” he said carefully, eyes gazing up at you. “I mean, put yourself in his shoes.”

“No, I’m fine with the ones I have on; homewrecking whore.”

“Hey,” he sighed, getting up from the corner of the bed to move to you. His hands grabbed you by the shoulders and he turned you to him. “The two of you screwed up, that’s a fact, but don’t be so hard on yourself. Look what’s coming out of it. Bucky and you are starting a family, getting a chance at a normal life.”

“And you want me to include Clint, as if we live in a perfect world. It will never work out, Steve…”

“How do you know if you haven’t tried?”

Staring into his blue eyes, you sighed. “Captain America is a great leader and brave, but Steve Rogers? He’s just plain annoying.”

Lifting his hands off your shoulders, Steve chuckled. “So, you’ll consider it?”

Staring down at Bucky’s blue shirt, you reached for it to fold. “Maybe.”


End file.
